Robert DuSold

I don’t know, I have read so many articles lately in the Times that are mostly dumb when it comes to theater… at least the business of theater. I came upon this one today and the only thing I can think of to do is write blogs to squeeze the tube of truth out of my brain.

Instead of articles that are well researched, or investigated or informative there’s a spate of sloppily written opinion pieces that purport to be about Broadway and the state of the theater, but in reality, are dog whistles for the hungry masses living in a bubble.

And they’re written by a theater critic “grappling” with a “reformation” for fucks sake.

They are tales of woe ignoring the most glaring, obvious reasons for the misery and pain and suffering of the actors quoted in this article.. the misery and pain and suffering assigned to them by a theater critic using the current fog of looking for something.. anything… anyone to blame.

Anything but the obvious.

The bubble seems to be getting bigger or maybe it’s bursting under the weight of a heavy dose of bullshit .. who knows?

I truly wonder what people who aren’t in show biz think of this stuff.. you know… actors working too hard and babies and days off and intimacy directors and mental health stipends.

I mean, I wonder if anyone who has a 40 hour a week job, or a 60 hour a week corporate job, or a restaurant job, or someone who travels for work who doesn’t see their kids for weeks on end, or people in dangerous occupations are looking at the bubble and thinking ..”sure I’d like 3 days off in a row and no travel and guaranteed safety and 250 bucks extra for being stressed and a few grand a week salary…”

I guess maybe they would. Or, they may go about doing their gig and thinking a lot of this is bullshit.

But, if they don’t think it’s bullshit and are looking to improve work conditions… safety, salary and opportunities … they might look to…

And theater is a..

I’m about to squeeze my truth tube.

Nearly every mishap or slight or injustice that are dissected in this article have a remedy… Actors Equity. Working conditions are under union .. and federal… jurisdiction. You file a grievance. You fill out an accident report.

The truth is the “Spider-Man” tragedies played out in the press more than anywhere else.. and Equity lost that battle in the papers.. the producers won hands down.

Equity nearly always loses battles in the press.

All of the rules governing rehearsals, hours worked, salary minimums, 10 out of 12s.. everything.. are negotiated and agreed upon by Equity.

Equity has consistently bargained away salaries.. and some safety protocols, per diems and more in negotiations with producers.

Understudies are not mandated in most regional contracts.. and that is simply due to a bargain the union made.

Anyone who’s survived in theater.. like me and most people I know .. have been through the wringer with safety issues and others and rarely found any resolution through the union.

That’s just the plain truth.

If anything sums up the failure of the union it’s the president of AEA Kate Shindle bitching about the hours she worked at a regional theater but too afraid to say the name of it.

My other fave thing about articles like this that inspire the woke brigade is the utter lack of knowledge about the economics of Broadway, or commercial theater in general.

But the pandemic — which closed the festival’s theaters for 14 months — gave her time to think. Over the course of 50 calendar drafts, she played with the parameters. What if the company produced five shows instead of the usual 11? What if they mounted one show at a time instead of several in rep? In one of those passes, since the exercise “wasn’t real anyway,” she decided to see if “you could do a five-day, 40-hour week and still get a production up. And lo and behold you could.”

Less shows, less contracts, less audience, less money.

I wonder if not mentioning money is purposeful because the arguments shit the bed when the shows mentioned.. “Pass Over” in particular, are flops.

That one was a huge flop that made a lot of industry peeps nervous due to the identity politics involved.

All of the babysitting and mental health coupons and intimacy experts and equity diversity and inclusion consultants indeed do cost money and it’s journalistic malpractice to just quote a producer who had one of the biggest flops on Broadway last season who said the cost is “minuscule” and not challenge that.

More bullshit for the bubble.

“But it’s a fine line,” he said. “Incorporating the ensemble in the conversation makes them feel trusted and cared for, and it’s good for the show. But — this sounds awful — even though I want to hear your problems, at some point I don’t want to. The bottom line is: What you have to do for the show is what you have to do for the show. And the director, the choreographer, is the one who decides what that is.”

Wayne Cilento

Now that may very well be the truth that bursts the bubble. And I would add the writers and producers into that mix.